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... t within a hundred paces of her
seat, I saw her rise and set out with the children towards the
hotel.
At the portico I caught up to her.
"I have perpetrated the--the piece of idiocy," I said as I came
level with her.
"Have you? Then you can take the consequences," she replied
without so much as looking at me. Then she moved towards the
staircase.
I spent the rest of the evening walking in the park. Thence I
passed into the forest, and walked on until I found myself in a
neighbouring principality.
At a wayside restaurant I partook of
an omelette and some wine, and was charged for the idyllic
repast a thaler and a half.
Not until eleven o'clock did I return home--to find a summons
awaiting me from the General.
Our party occupied two suites in the hotel; each of which
contained two rooms. The first (the larger suite) comprised a
salon and a smoking-room, with, adjoining the latter, jar candle the
General's study. It was here that he was awaiting me as he stood
posed in a majestic attitude beside his writing-table. Lolling
on a divan close by was De Griers.
"My good sir," the General began, "may I ask you what this is
that you have gone and done?"
"I should be glad," I replied, "if we could come straight to
the point. Probably you are referring to my encounter of today
with a German?"
"With a German? Why, the German was the Baron Burmergelm--a most
important personage! I hear that you have been rude both to him
and to the Baroness?"
"No, I have not."
"But I understand that you simply terrified them, my good sir?"
shouted the General.
"Not in the least," I replied.
"You must know that when I was
in Berlin I frequently used to hear the Berliners repeat, and
repellently prolong, a certain phrase--namely, 'Ja wohl!'; and,
happening to meet this couple in the carriage-drive, I found,
for some reason or another, that this phrase suddenly recurred
to my memory, and exercised a rousing effect upon my spirits.
Moreover, on the three previous occasions that I have met the
Baroness she has walked towards me as though I were a worm jar candle which
could easily be crushed with the foot. Not unnaturally, I too
possess a measure of self-respect; wherefore, on THIS occasion I
took off my hat, and said politely (yes, I assure you it was
said politely): 'Madame, j'ai l'honneur d'etre votre esclave.'
Then the Baron turned round, and said 'Hein!'; whereupon I
felt moved to ejaculate in answer 'Ja wohl!' Twice I shouted
it at him--the first time in an ordinary tone, and the second
time with the jar candle greatest prolonging of the words of which I was
capable. That is all."
I must confess that this puerile explanation gave me great
pleasure. I jar candle felt a strong desire to overlay the incident with an
even added measure of grossness; so, the further I proceeded,
the more did the gusto of my proceeding increase.
"You are only making fun of me! " vociferated the General as,
turning to the Frenchman, he declared that my bringing about of
the incident had been gratuitous. De Griers smiled
contemptuously, and shrugged his shoulders.
"Do not think THAT," I put in. "It was not so at all. I grant
you that my behaviour was bad--I fully confess that it was so,
and make no secret of the fact. I would even go so far as to
grant you that my behaviour might well be called stupid and
indecent tomfoolery; but, MORE than that it was not. Also, let me
tell you that I am very sorry for my conduct.
Yet there is one
circumstance which, in my eyes, almost absolves me from regret
in the matter. Of late--that is to say, for the last two or three
weeks--I have been feeling not at all well. That is to say, I
have been in a sick, nervous, irritable, fanciful condition, so
that I have periodically lost control over myself. For instance,
on more than one occasion I have tried to pick a quarrel even
with Monsieur le Marquise here; and, under the circumstances, he
had no choice but to answer me. In short, I have recently been
showing signs of ill-health. Whether the Baroness Burmergelm
will take this circumstance into consideration when I come to
beg her pardon (for I do intend to make her amends) I do not
know; but I doubt if she will, and the less so since, so far as
I know, the circumstance is one which, of late, has begun to be
abused in the legal world, in that advocates in criminal cases
have taken to justifying their clients on the ground that, jar candle at
the moment of the crime, they (the clients) were unconscious of
what they were doing--that, in short, they were out of health.
'My client committed the murder--that is true; but he has no
recollection of having committed it.' And doctors actually
support these advocates by affirming that there really is such a
malady--that there really can arise temporary delusions which
make a man remember nothing of a given deed, or only a half or a
quarter of it! But the Baron and Baroness are members of an
older generation, as well as Prussian Junkers and landowners. To
them such a process in the medico-judicial world will be
unknown, and therefore, they are the more unlikely to accept any
such explanation. What is YOUR opinion about it, General?"
"Enough, sir! " he t ... |
